Why would you write your own obituary?

There are several great reasons to write your own obituary. And, no, many people don’t think it’s morbid at all. Here are some of the advantages.

1. Your loved ones will thank you for it. The weeks after someone dies can be a busy, challenging time. Add to that the task of gathering important dates and placenames, and then summing up a life in 800 words or less, perhaps on a deadline, perhaps with some eloquence. It’s stressful. Preparing it yourself, ahead of time, is not unlike making a will or buying a cemetery plot. It can help set your mind at ease and be a great help to your survivors. Even leaving a rough draft for your loved ones will be a big help.
2. It’s fun. Really. It’s an opportunity to reflect on your life — not just on your accomplishments, but also your passions, your quirks, your imperfections — your humanity. Writing your own obit helps you take stock of your life. It allows you to call out the things you think are important, the things that make you happy and proud, or maybe some lessons learned that you’d like others to know.
3. You’re the expert. Unless you’re famous, an obituary is likely to be among the last written words about you. Writing your own obituary guarantees that you can guide what those words say. Additionally, you can set the tone, rather than waiting for your loved ones to write something that might be too flowery or more serious that you’d like.
4. Your obituary will be better for it. There’s a reason that journalists at major metropolitan newspapers pre-write obituaries for famous people. They want them to be good, and they know it takes time to craft a piece of writing that is moving and memorable. So get started, while you have time.
5. It’s a place to stash your deathcare wishes. Maybe you want a natural burial or a mariachi band at your memorial. A pre-written obit is a great place to write down and store these preferences.

Jamie Passaro is a writer of obituaries and other personal stories. She is the owner of the obituary writing service Dear Person, and is co-founder of Elegy.